Stay True!

Here I sit on a flight that I boarded with the first one way ticket of my life. I'm now a mere 90 minutes before landing in Israel, my ancestors' biblical home and my new home. This isn't a short term experiment - I plan and hope to stay for many years (I am officially becoming a citizen, passport and all). This day has been two and a half months coming. Nothing but preparation, goodbyes and drinking has occupied that time. Yet after all the time to ponder my decision and prepare for a new life the future remains, as Star Trek Six put it, "The Undiscovered Country."

My current focus on the unknown future eliminates any tendency I would otherwise have to update this journal with events of the previous year. In short, I closed my company (GAZM.org), began and completed a strategic consulting position with the Alzheimer's Research Foundation, taught another semester of the entrepreneurship class I created for my old Brooklyn high school, and continued to pursue my two major hobbies, improv comedy and trapeze.

The last 10 weeks of preparation for my big move to Israel was, of course, filled with people asking WHY?! I suppose I'll be asked this question just as incessantly upon my arrival and perhaps for the rest of my life. Why go to Israel? Isn't it a third world country? Don't you get killed as soon as you get off the plane? How will you survive? Sometimes the questions were asked out of naivete, sometimes out of sincere interest in learning and understanding and sometimes out of a flippant feeling of requirement and propriety. The answer is not easy to explain and involves various elements:

-I've lived in New York my entire life. It's time for a change. I've never been away for more than 6 weeks (and that was just once). I need to prove that the challenge of moving and establishing a new life is not beyond my abilities.

-New York is filled with those who moved there with big dreams and a desire to "make it" in the big city but I've just always been there. It's time I tried to make it somewhere where I can't simply go home to mommy after a hard day.

-I've been successful in New York, ran my own company for over 4 years, know the city well, know where I like to go and what I like to do. I eventually became burned out with complacency and contentness.

-I am spurred on by passion and just couldn't bring myself to be passionate about the type of work I've been doing up until the decision to move. Going to Israel is an easy way to break free and try my talents at a new field. Aside from improv (trapeze closes down during the winter) there was little to feel passionate about in New York anymore (but no one makes money from improv). It's time for a new, exciting chapter in the life of Jacob.

-I remember an old episode of 20/20 where those investing in stocks based on the throw of a dart did just as well as expert investors. Sometimes I feel the inexplicable need to jumpstart fate (or is it destiny?), do something others may see as hasty or not understand. Comfort leads to complacency. I enjoy spontaneity but more so I revel in the unknown. I have given myself up to an exciting roll of the dice and look forward to the challenge of maneuvering my way through what comes and turning it into what I want (even if I can't define that right now).

-Finally, of course, there is a spiritual/ideological connection to Israel. This answers the specific question of "why Israel?" I was born to Israeli parents who moved to New York, have been learning about Israel my entire life and feel it's time I did my part to help the homeland. This includes, but is not limited to, a 90 day commitment of military service (and a lifetime in the reserves). There is much more to this aspect of the decision to move and I hope to expand upon it in another entry.

I suppose everything comes down to being true to oneself. I had to do something in my life at this exact moment to shake everything up. Let the boggle pieces fall where they may. Security, familiarity and comfort with friends and family in New York remains. But a new challenge must be embarked upon right now. So here I go, 50 minutes until the plane lands.

Hopefully my journaling will serve not only as a documentation of my adventures but also as something to ponder for those feeling like they aren't being true to themselves, their passion and destiny. Regardless of who you are or what your opinion is, I'd love to get feedback from people so please don't hesitate to use the commenting feature.

Some have already taken strength from my emigration and can perhaps benefit further from my continued writing. You know who you are. Thus I end the first journal entry of the new chapter of my life with the mantra I used during the weeks of preparation:

"Whether the game shakes me or breaks me I hope it makes me a better man." -B.I.G.