RespectI've been thinking about respect lately and I'd like to share some thoughts. The only problem is that I'm unsure what my thoughts are on the matter.
Respect is not fear and awe; it...[is]the ability to see a person as he is, to be aware of his unique individuality. Respect, thus, implies the absence of exploitation. I want the loved person to grow and unfold for his own sake, and in his own ways, and not for the purpose of serving me.
Erich Fromm, U.S. psychologist. The Art of Loving, ch. 2 (1956).
Respect requires some sort of distance. We stand back and say "I'm who I am" and "you're who you are" and "I respect you for who you are, don't want to change you and in fact would like to learn from you and be inspired from having you in my life."
Respect isn't easy because of our natural tendency to want to change people, make them more like us, more like who we think we want to be, and/or more like who we imagine would be right for us.
Is it easier to respect someone we know or someone we don't? Sure, we should have a generous sense of respect for everyone but we respect those we know better (and have more reason to respect). However, we feel more qualified to critique and try to change those closest to us. Their business becomes our business. Their concerns become our concerns. And, finally, their unending desire to improve themselves becomes our unending desire to assist in those changes - sometimes at a pace too quick than they are ready for (which leads to the loss of respect).
Still more to think about...
